Sending Sympathy Flowers Abroad: Address, Timing and Card Wording

When sad news reaches you from far away, the hardest part is not being there. You may not make it to the funeral or be able to call at the house. Simple flowers and a few sincere lines can fill a little of that space for you. Here is the practical information you need, so you do not have to work it out at a difficult moment.

Where should the flowers go?

In most cases the safest address is the family's home. Condolence visits usually happen there; the flowers stay for days and remind the family who is thinking of them.

If you are considering the place of the service:

• Funeral home or chapel: first ask the family or the venue whether they accept flowers and when they can receive them. Add the name of the deceased and the service details to your order.
• Church: many churches accept flowers for a service, but there may be no one at the door. Adding the name and phone number of the person receiving them helps.
• Mosque: in Muslim families, taking flowers to the mosque where the funeral prayer is held is not a common custom. Sending them to the family home is more appropriate.

If you are unsure, ask a family member briefly; a bouquet at the wrong address can become one more thing for them to handle.

Recipient name and phone

Name a family member who will be at home as the recipient: a spouse, child or sibling. Always add a phone number. In a house of mourning the door is not always answered, and a call from the florist makes delivery smooth.

When to send

There is no day on which sympathy flowers are "too late". You can send them the day you hear, or a few days after the funeral; a bouquet that arrives once everyone has gone home can mean a great deal.

A few practical notes:

• Same-day delivery depends on the country's cut-off (12:00 Turkish time in most countries).
• There are no Sunday deliveries. If the service is on a Monday, you can plan the flowers for Saturday.
• If the flowers must be there for a specific service, it is safer to order for delivery the day before.

Colour and number: it depends on the culture

The general rule is simplicity: white and soft, pale shades express respect almost everywhere. Some countries have nuances worth knowing:

• Russia and neighbouring countries: mourning and remembrance call for an even number of flowers, the opposite of the odd-number rule for happy occasions.
• France: chrysanthemums are flowers of cemeteries and remembrance; never a gift, but fitting for sympathy.
• Germany: white lilies and chrysanthemums are associated with funerals.

You will find more in flower gifting taboos by country, and our guide to what rose colours mean also helps.

What to write on the card

You do not need long sentences; sincerity is enough. Write in a language the recipient reads. A few examples:

• "With deepest sympathy. Thinking of you and holding you close."
• "I am far away, but my thoughts are with you all."
• "I will always remember her smile. So sorry for your loss."
• "I am sorry I cannot be with you in these hard days. With love."

Do not forget to sign the card; the family will want to know who sent the flowers.